{"id":7761,"date":"2019-09-23T20:05:16","date_gmt":"2019-09-23T18:05:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/?p=7761"},"modified":"2025-11-23T18:26:36","modified_gmt":"2025-11-23T17:26:36","slug":"le-moustique","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/?p=7761","title":{"rendered":"Le moustique"},"content":{"rendered":"<div style=\"text-align: center;\">Il \u00e9tait une fois un gros moustique<br \/>\nlubrique<br \/>\navide de sang et de fornique<br \/>\nqui s\u2019appelait Ludovic.<br \/>\nEt Ludovic avait le chic<br \/>\nde laisser sa carte de visite \u00e9pidermique<br \/>\nen forme de gros boutons phalliques<br \/>\nsur ses victimes qui n\u2019\u00e9taient ni diab\u00e9tiques ni an\u00e9miques.<br \/>\nIl \u00e9tait heureux, il battait partout sa petite queue fr\u00e9n\u00e9tique<br \/>\nmais il aurait aim\u00e9 plonger sa trique<br \/>\ndans le sang pur de V\u00e9ronique,<br \/>\naux vertus qu\u2019on dit magiques,<br \/>\npour prolonger sa vie vampirique,<br \/>\nmais ne parvint que mollement rue Vanderschrick<br \/>\no\u00f9, en tombant, il s\u2019empala b\u00eatement sur sa pique,<br \/>\nfaisant gicler sur mon pare-brise tout ce sang suc\u00e9 si unique.<br \/>\nSes derni\u00e8res paroles furent magnifiques :<br \/>\n\u00ab Joyeux anniversaire, V\u00e9ronique.<br \/>\nTout \u00e0 coup j\u2019ai un d\u00e9clic :<br \/>\nle mal ne peut t\u2019atteindre, tu es ang\u00e9lique.<br \/>\nCa m\u2019apprendra, j\u2019avais qu\u2019\u00e0 m\u2019incarner en bique.<br \/>\n\u2026 couic. \u00bb<\/div>\n<\/p>\n<div style=\"padding-left: 240px; text-align: center;\" align=\"justify\"><em>Pour V\u00e9ronique B.<\/em><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Il \u00e9tait une fois un gros moustique lubrique avide de sang et de fornique qui s\u2019appelait Ludovic. Et Ludovic avait le chic de laisser sa carte de visite \u00e9pidermique en forme de gros boutons phalliques sur ses victimes qui n\u2019\u00e9taient ni diab\u00e9tiques ni an\u00e9miques. Il \u00e9tait heureux, il battait partout sa petite queue fr\u00e9n\u00e9tique mais il aurait aim\u00e9 plonger sa trique dans le sang pur de V\u00e9ronique, aux vertus qu\u2019on dit magiques, pour prolonger sa vie vampirique, mais ne parvint que mollement rue Vanderschrick o\u00f9, en tombant, il s\u2019empala b\u00eatement sur sa pique, faisant gicler sur mon pare-brise tout ce sang suc\u00e9 si unique. Ses derni\u00e8res paroles furent magnifiques : \u00ab Joyeux anniversaire, V\u00e9ronique. Tout \u00e0 coup j\u2019ai un d\u00e9clic : le mal ne peut t\u2019atteindre, tu es ang\u00e9lique. Ca m\u2019apprendra, j\u2019avais qu\u2019\u00e0 m\u2019incarner en bique. \u2026 couic. \u00bb Pour V\u00e9ronique B.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7790,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7761","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-la-rime-a-tout-prix"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7761","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7761"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7761\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7888,"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7761\/revisions\/7888"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/7790"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7761"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7761"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/claudinemarichal.be\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7761"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}